The Sometimes Toxic Life of an Empath

Sometimes it can all be draining...

By Jael Wyatt

Empathy is defined as the capability to place yourself in another’s shoes, or being able to share the feelings of someone else. The life of an empath has the potential to be a difficult yet rewarding journey because you operate differently than others do. The need for empaths is at an all-time high, but it does have its challenges.

 

Empathy takes connections and relationships to the next level and opens the door for a deeper level of companionship. Being able to feel what others are feeling without them having to express it sparks a different type of compassion and understanding – something I believe this generation is desperately lacking. When you’re an empath, it literally pains you to see others in pain. In a self-centered society, it is easy for people to be overlooked and for loneliness and depression to take over. Many people don’t stop to consider how others are feeling or how their actions might affect someone else feel – but that is the very nature of empaths. When you have empathy, you put others before yourself because you understand what other people are feeling. You become a better listener, give better advice and people tend to gravitate towards you because they know that with you, their feelings are a priority. Often, you find yourself in the middle of disputes between friends or peers because they trust you to help them see each other’s point of view and help resolve the issue. Empathy is synonymous with sympathy, feeling bad or sorry for someone, but with empathy you actually experience the emotions of someone else. You grieve with others, you laugh with others, you cry with others and you smile with others.

 

All the things that make an empath a great asset for society can make it difficult for them as a person. You will find that while most empaths are aware of their value to others, they find being an empath draining. Because empaths are often the “go-to” person and give so much of themselves, they rarely get the chance to be refilled. It is regular to be emotionally overwhelmed and you often overexert yourself trying to counsel and comfort others. Putting others before yourself also comes with its challenges because you rarely take time to acknowledge your own feelings. You occupy yourself with the stress and anxiety of others so much that their stress and anxiety becomes your own. Not to mention, you are more susceptible to emotional manipulation. You feel others emotions so strongly that you put your emotions on the back burner, basing your decisions on other’s needs. Too much empathy can be considered dangerous in that there is a lack of self awareness. It is difficult for a lot of empaths to find that balance between helping others and engaging in self help. 

 

 

As beneficiaries of the love that empaths offer, we have to make sure not to take advantage of them and acknowledge their sacrifices. Always be sure to appreciate your support system and recognize that sometimes, even the support system needs support of their own. Be honest with them but – also be patient . As empaths, we have to make sure that we are taking the proper steps to ensure our sanity and well-being. Being the sensitive beings that we are, sometimes we have to separate ourselves from others to establish boundaries and spend time alone. Set aside time to acknowledge your own feelings and replenish yourself in whatever ways you find work for you. 

 

 

To all my fellow empaths, I see you and I appreciate you. 

 

 

“One doesn’t have to operate with great malice to do great harm. The absence of empathy and understanding are sufficient.” – Charles M. Blow

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