I am definitely one of those people who makes New Year’s Resolutions every single year. I do not think there is anything corny about it. Each year, I learn something different and need to adjust accordingly. In 2020, my goal was to have a lot of new experiences and learn more about myself. Despite Covid and everything being shut down, I was pretty much able to do that. I am thankful for all of the experiences I had in 2020 that taught me a lot about myself. I would not know myself in the capacity I do now if it were not for those experiences. However, I did not practice discernment. I let those experiences come into my life without filtering them. I moved without discernment which is why in 2021 my theme is INTENTIONALITY! I am still in the process of learning myself, but now I will, in the capacity I can control, determine what comes in and out of my life.

To help you understand what I mean, I can provide an example. This is not exactly what happened to me but is a close comparison. In 2020, I wanted to have new experiences which were, in part, so that I could make new friends. I have kept my circle small but I wanted to expand it. There is nothing inherently wrong with wanting more friends. However, the issue arose because I let just about anyone in my life without analyzing their intentions first. When you move without intention, you can invite chaos in your life. I would get weird feelings about the people around me but did not do anything about it. I viewed those weird feelings as isolated incidents and not character flaws.  I did not realize until months later that those people and I were not meant to be in each other’s lives. This is why discernment and intentionality are so important. With intentionality, I would have thought beforehand about what exactly I wanted. I would have understood why I wanted new people in my life. I would have understood what kind of new people I wanted in my life. I would have understood at what capacity I wanted these people in my life. Discernment would have allowed me to separate the good from the bad.

I do not regret interacting with any of the people I met in 2020. Like I said, I learned a lot about myself. I have learned about things that I love, hate, am indifferent towards, am passionate about, etc.

In 2021, I want to be more intentional. I am growing into the kind of woman I can be proud of and want the best for. I cannot allow just anyone and anything to come into my life and have temporary or permanent effects on me. I realized that I need to treat friendships the same way that I treat physical touch. Physical touch is very low on my list of love languages. I do not accept it from many people and rarely seek it out myself. I believe that positive or negative touches can impact your body for a long time. I do not want people to have that power to leave impressions on my body, so I am very intentional about who I allow to touch me and who I touch. I want to have this same perspective on who I allow to even be in my life. I don’t mean to sound harsh and I am certainly not encouraging people to have a cold heart. In fact, I am encouraging just the opposite. Intentionality is about using your head to protect your heart. Now, there is no surefire way to protect ourselves from getting hurt, but we can trust our instincts and use discernment as we encounter new people and seek out any kind of relationship – platonic or romantic. I urge everyone to be more intentional, especially about the people we allow in our space and our lives because it can greatly affect their life long after they are gone.