The Defining Series was launched to amplify the experiences and testimonies of members of our community. In honor of the Un-Associated 5th Anniversary, we have brought back the community initiative to continue to share stories, triumphs, and challenges as a way to illuminate the journeys of our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. We have more in common than we realize, especially as young believers in Christ, and The Defining Series serves as a vehicle to connect us through the common thread of God’s presence in our lives and the myriad of ways in which He makes Himself known to us.

Editor-in-Chief Danielle Clayton sat down with Fairfield, CT native Jaya Davison who is unassociated with fear.

Danielle Clayton: I’m Danielle Clayton and this is The Defining Series and you are?

Jaya Davison: Jaya Davison.

D: And what are you un-associated with?

J: I am un-associated with fear.

D: Can you explain your relationship to that word and why you chose it?

J: For the longest time, I have been the a person that worries, especially about my future. I have a fear of not being successful in life, a fear of whether or not I would be okay, whether or not I would make it in my career, so always just being fearful and being anxious about what my life may entail and if I would be able to do what I said I was going to do.

D:  I’m curious because with the word success, I think the anxiety often comes from other people’s definitions of success and not a meaning we’ve carved out for ourselves. Is that where the fear comes from, because you have been following someone else’s definition of success? Or does it come from knowing what you want to do and the fear of not being able to do that thing? Or is it both?

J: For me, I think it stems from not wanting to follow in other people’s footsteps in life. I’ve seen how people’s lives have ended up and I see where they are in life and they haven’t gone as far as they could have because things happened and I don’t want that for myself. So, for me, it’s like I have to do better, I have to break those generational curses, I have to be better in life and I want better for myself.

D: In this vision of who you want to be and where you want to be, what would you say your goal or your vision is at this point in your life?

J:  What I envision is being a self-sufficient, so having my own income, having my own place, being able to, do things for myself and not depend on other people and being successful in my career. I want to become an athletic trainer, which I’m working toward now, as well as a registered nurse, so I’m trying to do two things at once. As far as the financial aspect, I want to be able to give back to my mom and be able to help family and friends, things like that, which is why I see myself being self-sufficient and self-established.

D: I feel like everyone wants to be able to give back to the parents, so that’s very relatable. I think it’s so interesting that you said self-sufficient because and I’m not correcting you but I would just challenge you a little bit because I don’t think you really want to be self-sufficient, you really want God to be able to bless you in a way where you can provide for yourself.

J: Definitely.

D: Because there are some people that really do want to be self-sufficient and want to be able to say I did this by myself, I didn’t need God and stuff like that, but I know you meant having a capacity to be able to provide for yourself. I know for me, my family has devotion every night and I know something that I always say when I pray is, thank you for providing me with resources to take care of myself. Thank you for giving me means to pay for things and for the ability to buy my own food and even a lot of times also mobility like you’re a lot of things that we take for granted that other people don’t have the access to so easily. But I think that’s a prayer for a lot of people to be honest, so I appreciate you sharing that with me. And what would you say was the catalyst for you kind of wanting to become an associated with fear?

J: There was a time where I was talking to my mom and telling her how I get anxiety and so fearful, consumed by thoughts like what if I don’t become this or that? I was just experiencing so much fear and anxiousnessess and she pointed to the verse in the Bible where God says not to think about tomorrow (Matthew 6:34). Worry not about tomorrow, you worry about today and I was just like, wow, I really do need to stop thinking ahead because that’s not where God wants me to be. God doesn’t want me thinking and stressing or having anxiety. I know those are not things of God. I need to focus on today. What can I do today to? Take me one step closer to where I want to be instead of thinking ahead. I’m more so worried about the present. When she told me that, I came to a realization that I don’t have to be fearful of anything. I know God’s got me. And when I look in His Word, it says that He’s a provider. It said that He’s all these things so it’s like why am I worrying? So, it was very freeing and a realization for me that I’m worrying over nothing. If I just give it to God and of course pray and do what I’m supposed to be doing, I know He’s got me.

D: What are some scriptures that help you in moments when you’re in your head and or when you have anxiety?

J: “God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of love, power and sound mind“(2 Timothy 1:7). It’s easier said than done and it’s still a day-to-day process. Talking to my mother when those feelings come about helps because she talks me down and speaks life into me and reminds me what God’s Word says.

D: I think a scripture that also might help you is we are more than conquerors through Christ who loved us (Romans 8:27) and then there’s a scripture that tells us same power that the God used to raise Jesus Christ from the dead is in us (Romans 8:11) and some from does the same power that we have with us. As leaders and especially as young people, I think sometimes we don’t realize how much power God has given us and how much authority we have over the things that scare us and seem so much bigger than us. In this process of learning to really give your fears to God, what have you learned and this process so far about yourself and what have you learned about God so far?

J:  think I learned that I don’t have to do things by myself or have to worry about things on my own. Even when I mentioned that I was talking to my mom about my problems, that was me doing something different. Usually, I hold things in and say to myself, I can take care of it. I got it and God hears me. But I think it’s also good to open up to other people who are enlightened and in the Spirit. I know, my mom is so in tune, and she’s so gifted and it’s good to have people who understand where you’re coming from. It’s okay to open up and not be alone. In situations where I am feeling the anxiety and fear, one thing I learned about God is that He’s there. I always question, do you hear me? Do you understand? And He really showed himself and proved Himself to be there.

D: How would you advise someone in your situation that also wants to be un-associated with fear? What would you tell them? How would you encourage them?

J: Talk about your struggles. I say let it out. What are you fearful of? What is it about this that makes you have that feeling? Once you come to terms and you realize what that trigger may be or why you’re feeling like that, and what it is and what, you have to watch out for. It’s also important to trust God and to talk to God about your fears. God, I’m dealing with this. Help me. Give me a plan like stuff like that. I feel like that’s something that I would advise somebody to do when it’s pertaining to fear or anything else that they’re struggling with. Let it be known what you’re dealing with and then just trust Him and watch Him change that aspect or that feeling inside you. It may be different for everybody else. Some people I would encourage to journal what they’re feeling and some people have to talk someone. It’s just different for everybody, but I would think the first step is let it be known and figure out why you’re feeling like that. Find somebody who can be on the phone right there in the call to help you through that feeling and who will encourage you and empower you in the Word of God.

D: I have one last question for you. What would would present you, knowing everything you know at this time, say to your younger self the younger Jaya?

J: I think I would tell younger Jaya that she is loved. I think even growing up, it kind of felt like I would do things for people, but they wouldn’t do the same for me. I would go above and beyond for people that never went above and beyond for me. It’s something I’m still dealing with a little but, but I would tell Jaya, you are loved. Don’t let the thoughts of the enemy or even yourself try to discourage you. Don’t let that get in your head because there’s absolutely people who do and will do the same for you. So that’s what I would tell her, as well as not to worry.

D: As we come to a closer, is there anything else you want to say or share before we finish up?

J: I’m just grateful to share I guess my un-association with fear, how I’ve dealt with it and what I’ve gone through because maybe there’s somebody out there that may going through the same thing and they don’t know how to get through it. So, any opportunity to help makes me feel good. So, I’m just grateful to be here.