Math was never my favorite subject in school, but what I remember distinctly, more than anything, are the formulas, specifically of slope, of surface area, of circumference, etc. and really, for no specific reason. In math and academia in general, formulas are essential to solve anything. However, I’m realizing that in life, formulas don’t have the same importance. In fact, perceiving life as a formula is extremely limiting, and ultimately leads to disappointment and dissatisfaction, at the very least. Allow me to explain.
The formula is really representative of any set plans or expectations we may have about an experience. It’s more than making a certain plan for your life, but also expecting there’s a formula to life. In other words, if you do things in a particular way and that way only, you will yield happiness, success, or whatever it is you seek. Now, there is no one way to serve God. Of course, as Christians, we are to live as the pecuilar people that God has called us to be, set apart from the world, but notice the body of Christ is comprised of several parts that work together to create one cohesive body, just like the human body. Everyone doesn’t occupy one role and living by a formula creates many of one thing instead of a multiplicity of things and people the way God intended. Instead of allowing life to occur organically, the formula it’s a belief in shoulds. If I go to college, I should know my major and if I know my major, I should graduate with a job. If I pray for something, God should give it to me. If I do what God asks of me, I should have no problems. If I get into a relationship, I should be married in x amount of years. By this age, I should have done this. The root of this formulaic understanding is comparison. We see someone who we have something in common with – be it age, be it career, etc, and they’ve accomplished something we haven’t, and we internalize that, and we make their feat about us. I should be doing that too and we kill ourselves trying to achieve what they have, and that standard is the formula I am talking about. No one told us we were lagging or that we should be where they are, but we’ve taken it upon ourselves to compare ourselves.
Comparison, as the saying goes, is the thief of joy and to take it further, it is the enemy of God’s will. Because now, we are planning our lives, not based on God’s will for us, but based on what others are doing.
Oftentimes, the people we are comparing ourselves too, the people who are causing us to question what we should be doing are not necessarily people of God and so now, we are not only comparing ourselves to others, but living in our flesh and following individuals who are not of God, so we’re all the way of course. The world tells people when they should be doing x and doing y, but that doesn’t mean it’s true or right and ten times out of ten, what the world tells people is diametrically opposed to what God’s word says. Every single man and woman in the Bible had an entirely different path and purpose. The only thing they had in common was their faith, and that God intervened in their lives and transformed them past the confines of who and what they thought they could be. Transformation cannot occur and joy and peace cannot be found living according to a formula, which is ultimately, a worldly standard.
The truth of the matter is that life is not a sprint. It’s not about who gets things done the fastest or who can be the most impressive. Life is not even about us, if we’re living it right, so why do we get so bogged down with the details? As Christians, our life is not our own and if we live it as God intended, we can’t be focused on the formula of things because we are much too human to anticipate the work God is doing in our lives. Life is meant to be lived, not predicted, and believe me, I am talking to myself. I am not where I thought I’d be at 22, but then I remind myself that I’m 22 and that my life has barely begun. The only thing I should be doing is exercising faith and living my life as God leads me. The shoulds limit God’s plan, but they also place you in a box because there is only so much you can do, especially if you’re comparing yourself to others. My father has always told me of comparisons that if you’re trying to be like someone else, you can only go so far as they go. You cannot achieve or do any more than the individual has that is what you’re attempting to be, but being yourself, being who God has called you to bee? The possibilities there are endless.
If you take away nothing else, please take away this: If you are a person with faith in anything, especially God, the formulas, by nature have to go out the window. There is nothing formulaic about faith. In fact, it defies logic and if we are to truly be walking by faith and not by sight, we cannot be so fixated on how we think things should be. We do not serve a God of monotony nor do we serve a God who is predictable and like anyone or anything else, so why do we want to lead lives according to the standards of the world or others? Like a snowflake, each one of us is different, and we possess different gifts, different sensibilities, different purposes, inclinations, etc, which is the opposite of a formula which involves intrinsically fixed values and circumstances. If your life looks nothing like you planned, then praise God! If you are not where you thought you would be and have no idea what’s next, then you are exactly where God wants you and everything that follows is not up to any formula, but up to you and whether or not you will trust Him to lead you to greater and unprecedented heights.
Scripture Reading: Proverbs 16:9; 2 Corinthians 5:7
