The Prodigal Son is a classic. If you don’t know it, you can find it in the book of Luke (Luke 15-32)! For the sake of time, I’ll give you the spark notes, but I encourage you to read it when you get the chance; you might see yourself in this parable. SO! In short, this parable is about a father and two sons, one son in particular requests his share of the estate and once it’s given to him, he decides to go out and indulge in worldly things and eventually blows his inheritance. Overtime he decides to return back to his father, “but while he was still far off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him” (Luke 15:20). The father commanded that his family celebrated his son’s return and prepared his son for the feast and celebration of his return. There’s more to the story but I’ll park there.

Now let me tell you why I thought I would neeevverrr be in the Prodigal Son’s circumstance. To sum it up in one word, it was my pride. Here’s the tea for some context. For as long as I could remember, I’ve been in church. Both of my parents and much of my extended family were heavily involved in the church. I never missed Sunday school, I was baptized, I sang in the choir and praise team, VBS and Christian camp were my life. I’ve also been committed to a life of sobriety and celibacy since I was young. Is my ego showing yet? I even went to the point of going to Seminary and obtained a Bachelor’s in Theology, yet I still, like the Prodigal Son, took my estate –the things that God had blessed me with – and carelessly wasted it on worldly glorification and indulgence.

I was selfish. Things didn’t work out the way I wanted them to. I finished a 4-year degree to end up without the opportunity I thought God promised me for that time in my life. I had come up against adversity time and time again, I was confused, I was depressed. All while still making it seem to others, that I was walking in the light God had given me. I was living a lie. There was a period of time where I stepped away from faith and tried to convince myself that the power of manifestation would give me what I thought I wanted. I entertained relationships that left me feeling empty. I was forcing myself to recite these affirmations when in my heart, I didn’t believe them. I was miserable, and it showed. No matter how many selfies I would post, how much stuff I bought, goals I achieved, friends I made, or how many nights I went downtown, nothing could suffice for this void I tried to fulfill within my own means.

After graduation, I expected a breakthrough but God’s plan was to break me down to the point where I couldn’t help but see the state I was really in. I found myself in a space of spiritual famine, and no matter where I looked for fulfillment, I was never given what I needed. It wasn’t until I had humbled myself and acknowledged the fact that there was nothing else I could do, but return to my Heavenly Father. My pastor once said that “sometimes we don’t know that Jesus is all we need until Jesus is all we have.” Jesus said that he is “the way and the truth and the life” and that “no one comes to the Father except through him” (John 14:6). I had to ask Jesus to come back into my heart and into my life, so that I could return to the Father, and just like the Prodigal Son, God met me on my way back to Him and embraced me despite the state I was in.

Just because you believe in God doesn’t mean you don’t walk away from Him at times, but my question to you is will you humbly return home to The Father? If you are feeling depleted in your spirit, if you are experiencing a spiritual famine, I want you to know that God has a feast and celebration waiting for you, just as He did for me, and He will prepare you for your seat at His table. Every now and then we need to ask God to show us where we need to return to Him so we can turn back and have Him meet us halfway. Sometimes we slip up (Romans 3:23), but thank God, His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9).

A Blog Post by Dena Williams